It has been quite some time since I've
updated the blog! Lately, updates have been happening through
facebook. Jonathan and I make all posts public so you don't have to
have an account or be our friend to see our posts related to him.
You can just search for either one of us or friend us! Soo much has
happened over the last few moths, and I would be for days if I went
through every detail. Jonathan finished the second transplant at the
end of July, and it was much better than the first one. Don't get me
wrong, it was still an unpleasant experience, but I don't think
anything could compare to the horror of the first transplant. When
he started the second one we knew he had a pretty serious kidney
infection, and it's a miracle that he had no complications during the
transplant. However, we were told, when he was discharged, that the
antibiotics he was taking would not be able to completely get rid of
the infection and the kidney would have to be removed. The rarity
and severity of this infection was very real. Only 200 cases have
been reported worldwide with most being identified in autopsies! No
thank you...let's get that thing taken out! So August 29, he had his
right kidney removed. The surgery went very well, and everything was
contained in the kidney. This was a major blow for Jonathan mentally
and physically, and it certainly was not the surgery we were hoping
he would be having. Around the same time as the surgery, we also
found out that the transplants had not completely eliminated the
disease, and his tumor marker was going back up. The number is
supposed to between 1-0, and stem cell had brought it all the way
down to 1.2. We truly felt like stem cell was the answer and that
God had opened the doors for everything to go through so quickly.
This was and still is devastating to us, but we have not given up
hope!
While our doctors tried to find a chemo
or medication that could stop the growth, we just began to cry out to
God. The Bible says that God 'plans to prosper you and not to harm
you, plans to give you hope and a future.' So if God plans for us to
have hope and a future, than so should we! A few weeks after the
surgery, we took a much needed trip to Denver, Boulder, and Estes
Park. Jonathan showed me around his college town where he no doubt
behaved like an angel ;)! We also went to the ranch where Jonathan
worked for many years, Wind River Ranch, in Estes Park, and I finally
was able to see this place and meet the people I have heard so much
about. It is truly a sacred place! To put into words what Wind
River means to Jonathan would be impossible, and we are just grateful
for the opportunity to go there, together. We are also so thankful
for the love and support we received while there. We love you guys
and can't wait to get up there again soon! I've posted pics below
from our trip!
When we returned home, we met with
Jonathan's oncologist Dr. Tu, and he suggested a chemo regimen to try
to stop the progression. A few days after the treatment, we were off
again to Destin, FL. We had an amazing time and were completely
believing that the chemo was working and we'd be back on track.
Unfortunately, the chemo had zero affect on the disease. The number
was getting high and Dr. Tu feared that we were running out of
options. The strange thing was that Jonathan was not really in any
pain, at least not anything significant, so it was hard for us to
understand how this could be happening.
While in Colorado, we lost a dear
friend of the family in a car accident, and it reminded us of
something very real. No one is promised tomorrow. We can all say it
over and over again, but until you are really faced with it, I don't
think you can really know what it means. It doesn't matter what's
happening in Jonathan's body, it doesn't matter if you're in picture
perfect health, none of us are promised tomorrow. So while we waited
for more treatment options, we decided to do something
crazy..something we had been talking about for months and planned
over and over in our minds...We got MARRIED!! A lot of you know this
through facebook already, but for those of you don't...surprise!!
On October 11 we decided that on October 20 we were going to get
married! My poor mother had a week to plan everything, but she did a
fabulous job! If you're wondering if your invite got lost in the
mail, we decided to keep it very small with only our immediate
families and grandparents. We also decided to keep it very quiet and
wait to announce it. We thought it would be better for people to be
surprised rather than to hear 'you're not invited.' We meant no
harm, and we hope that everyone understands. Everything took place
in Mandeville, LA, on the beautiful lakefront, and it was the most
perfect day either of us could have imagined. Everything fell
perfectly into place, including my wedding dress, which was purchased
2 days before the wedding and needed no alterations! For all you
ladies out there, you know this just does not happen! We had the
most amazing photographer who I will forever be indebted to!! She
wrote the sweetest write up about being a part of our wedding that
you can read here and
also view some of our pictures. We took this huge leap of faith
because we truly believe that we will have a future together!! We
cannot say thank you enough for all of the sweet messages people have
sent to us! It means so much to us to know how many people support
us and love us! We had no idea our story would have such an impact
on people, and we hope that through it all you see our faith and what
God is doing through us. We pray for that everyday.
The day after our wedding, we had to
head back to Houston for Jonathan to start a new chemo treatment on
Monday. We got the results back for the tumor marker, and it was
high, very high. I'm not getting into what exactly the numbers are
because we feel at this point, it really doesn't matter. We don't
want to take everyone on a number's roller coaster. CT results came
back that day as well, and we had a better understanding of what was
happening. Just to recap, Jonathan was diagnosed with a large
primary tumor behind his sternum, innumerable nodules in both lungs,
a large liver tumor and 2 small brain lesions. At the end of the
transplants, the primary tumor had decreased by over half, the lungs
cleared up significantly, the liver tumor had decreased by half, and
the brain lesions were taken care of through gamma knife radiation.
Ok, so when the results came back in October, the primary tumor
decreased even further, two lung nodules increased a bit, and the
liver tumor had doubled in size. Of course I have my theories as to
what is going on, but I think everyone could agree that the liver
seemed to be the problem. Dr. Tu and his nurse practitioner, Rosaly, are the absolute best team
we could have ever prayed for and they will always fight for us.
They are also very realistic with us. Dr. Tu had said when the
number started going up again that he was no longer trying to cure
Jonathan but rather maintain the disease, but even to maintain it
would be a miracle.
Dr. Tu changed the scheduled chemo
treatment to accommodate these new findings and added a chemo that
would specifically target the liver. This chemo had not been used
for his type of cancer so it was a gamble. Jonathan received this
new chemo through an infusion pump he carried around in a fanny pack
for 46 hours. Yes, he hates the fanny pack and who wouldn't?! A few
hours before he was scheduled to be disconnected, he started having
severe upper abdominal pain. We went to the ER to have everything
checked out and the pain was getting worse by the second. Very
strong pain medicine was doing nothing for him! They admitted him
overnight, and when the doctor came to see him in the morning, they
said that they feared the liver was continuing to grow despite this
chemo as well. However, a closer look at the x-ray showed a
different diagnosis...he was extremely constipated!! I have never
been more relieved to hear that the man I just married was full of
..well, you know! They wanted to keep him a few days until he
'cleared out' and to help to manage his pain, but the pain shifted to
his side and never went away. A few nights turned into the weekend.
Our 'severe constipation' diagnosis turned into an unexplained fever
which turned into 'we're sorry but we think your liver tumor is in
fact still growing.' They said that they would manage his pain as
best they could, but if this chemo is not working (which they assumed it was not), there are not many
options. I'm not going to go into exactly what we were being told
over the our time there, but I will tell you that it was not good.
Some of you may think this is crazy
talk, and that's ok, just accept me for my craziness. I didn't
believe what we were being told in the hospital; in fact, I flat out
rejected it. No, I don't have a medical background (although I do
know more about cancer than I ever hoped to), but I know what I
believe in my spirit to be true and that is that Jonathan is already
healed. I also believe what the Bible says is
true, which is that Jonathan's and everyone's sickness has already been
paid for. No, I don't know why some people are not healed or why we
are going through this. I do know that God has a purpose and plan
for all of us and it doesn't involve us getting sick. The
truth is I don't know what the future holds for me or Jonathan, but I
know that God holds our future. I trust that he will see us through
the dark times no matter what, and what happens in our life is not by
accident. Trust me, when I see the love of my life going through the
most horrific things you can imagine, the first person I want to
blame is God. Why is He allowing this to happen? Why hasn't he
taken care of this by now? Why Jonathan..why me? It's
overwhelmingly depressing and defeating at times. But every time,
not just some times, every single time we need God to show up, he
does. Not when we think it's time, of course, but when he's ready.
We stayed 1 week in the hospital. It
was a terrific honeymoon in the luxury suite at MD Anderson
overlooking the parking garage. Jonathan was discharged with
morphine pills he was supposed to take morning and night for an
indefinite amount of time. Four days after being discharged we met
with the doctor for a follow-up visit. Jonathan had no pain in his
abdomen; he had also not taken a single morphine pill. What happened
that day no one could have imagined...the tumor marker was down 87%.
It went from really high to 'I can't explain this'. A chemo treatment that has never been used for germ cell tumors not only stopped the cancer but significantly destroyed it!! Jonathan
received the second treatment a few weeks ago, and on Monday, the number went down
again. To have multiple doctors look at you and say that they can't
explain what's happening is a feeling I can't explain!! We
know exactly what's happening!! Dr. Tu said the news was his
Thanksgiving and Christmas present! Three doctors told us, “I
don't know what you're doing, but keep doing it.” We don't know what happens from here and we are no where near the safe zone, but we thank
God for the miracles we have already received!! We'll keep doing
what we're doing, all of you keeping doing what you're doing, and
we're all going to sit back and watch what God's doing! He is now on
his third treatment this week and it will continue every two weeks.
He has a brain MRI scheduled for Monday. Please pray for clear and
positive results!
Needless to say, this Thanksgiving we
are overwhelming thankful for life, family, friends, memories, and
each and every day we have together!! Our hearts are so full we
could literally burst! We are so thankful for all of you reading
this and believing for us. Your support through this tough time has
has meant more to us than we could ever express. Every card,
facebook post, message, text, call, email, etc. we receive is
appreciated immensely. You guys have really out done yourselves, and
we hope that if ever the tables were turned, we would show the same
level of support we have received for all of you. Thank you, Thank
you, Thank you!!
Please continue to keep us and our families in your prayers! We ask that you pray for Dr. Tu and Rosaly, as well, that God would give them the wisdom to direct our next steps!
We love and appreciate all of you,
Lindsey and Jonathan
Almost forgot...On Sunday, December 2,
our friends and family in New Orleans, along with Friends In Need,
are hosting a benefit for us. The event will take place at 5 pm at
Generations Hall in the Warehouse District. There will be a live
band, free food and drinks, a silent auction, raffles, door prizes,
etc.! I saw some of the items being auctioned, and you will not be
disappointed!! Jonathan and I are planning to be at the event, and we
would love to see everyone there having a great time with us!
Tickets are $40, and can be purchased at the door or online here.
Can't wait to see everyone!!